You have read the book… any book that talks about spreading someone’s ashes. Heck, I’ll make one up.

Sandra found herself on the jagged edge of the shore, heart breaking but knowing she had to fulfill Robert’s last wishes to return to the sea that he loved … at times even more than his love for her. She dropped to her knees and whispered a blessing to the water as she returned him to his long-lost love. Peace settled over her soul as she rose, and it followed her to the cottage as she had a cup of tea.

I am here to set the record straight; this is bull hockey!

I mentioned a bit ago my brother had passed and one of his wishes was to have his cremains (ashes) spread at different places… lots of different places. It will be three months in a few weeks and it was starting to wear on me having him as a house guest in my dining room (What? Where else was he to go? and he loved a nice meal… seemed logical).

This weekend I tried to fulfill a few of his wishes; in the river by our childhood home, at my mother’s cenotaph; near one set of grandparents’ headstones, near his best friend’s parents’ headstones, and while I was there our great grandparents’ headstones.

At my mother’s cenotaph, I realized that the books and movies (well except for Donnie’s ashes in the Big Lebowski) had led me astray. This is not work for the faint of heart. Have you cleaned out a wood burning stove? Fireplace? Random fire pit? Times it by 10 and make the ash finer.  Honestly, there was no breeze and at one point I said out loud, Dang It Donald you are on my damn shirt! WTF! Thankfully I was alone, often talk to myself and I have quite a dark sense of humor. We had a very stereotypical older sister/ younger baby of the family brother relationship. There is no doubt in my mind that he is wherever he is laughing his fool head off at me.

I have three more stops and won’t be finished until March (again pretty sure he is laughing) and have learned a lot this weekend that I will pass on to you. You are stronger than you think. You can tackle the things you think you cannot. And a hot shower is a lifesaver at times.

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