We called the cops twice last week to the library. Ok, we called once, and a patron called the other time. End result was the same: Cops at the library. And that makes me feel defeated on so many levels. First off, I am not wading into a fight between teens with a circle of nine others around them. I can’t touch anyone so what am I going to do? Yell “stop fighting!” or “you are making poor choices!”  We all know how well that will work. The cops got there, the fight was over and parents who where there with their kids were upset that we allow this sort of thing to go on. Yeah, discouraging to say the least.

I stopped the daily cards about four weeks ago. I read somewhere that you should read if you were not in the proper place mentally. Seemed like good advice. I had also gotten to the place where I wanted to do a spread, not a complex one but maybe just a past, present, future one. But I was having trouble coming up with a question. They all seemed silly or small or not worthy of the cards. I made the cards a nice box and put them away.

I got the cards out this morning (I close tonight so I go in later) and asked them: How do I deal with this ugly teen vibe after school in the library? I dealt the past, present, future spread above. This helped to show me I need to be better with my phrasing of my question as it looks to be the answer is: be filled with anxiety and don’t sleep.  Darn you Nine of Swords.

Ok, not really. My read on this spread (and I am a newbie so don’t throw rocks). Is that in the past I felt in control in the library with the teens, I felt I was making progress and changing the mindset. (and maybe I was). But now I feel alone, I feel that I have no support in this issue from my supervisor (who has been informed of this) and I am discouraged at the path this has taken. And finally what to do, this is bothering me and will continue to do so. It is probably beyond my pay grade. So maybe it is time to meet with the town chief of police and see if they will have a patrol car drive through our alley from 4-6 randomly during the week or maybe an officer just pop into the desk to say hi to staff. A presence to get this tamped back down.

I did get out of this read that this is not normal; and is something that needs my attention before it gets completely out of hand. That I can’t do it all alone. And that is what I needed from the cards all along, just a shove to say, go do this, trust your gut.

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