We are in a “cabin” in the Smokeys for a week. And by cabin, I mean there is hot/cold running water, full kitchen, air conditioning , hot tub and four TVs (don’t get me started in the plethora of TVs and no books) But we are hiking and fishing, grilling and playing board games as a family at night. Not totally unplugged but more so than at home.
It has given me a chance to finish my book, How to Raise an Adult by Julie Lythcott-Haims. It has been a good read for me for a few reasons. First, I feel like it supports the hands off parenting I have been working hard to embrace for the last three years. It has not always been a popular choice in my network. (You are letting him to WHAT? Alone?)
Secondly, it has helped me to refocus on these last two years of high school. What do I really want to teach him, make sure he understands? How to change a car tire? Advanced math? How to write a cover letter? Don’t get me wrong, the child could survive, but I also feel I do a lot of the things he needs to learn because my OCD self just finds it easier to do myself.
It also has been mind blowing to read the examples of parents who didn’t let go, who tried to micro manage the next step and the results. For instance, the man who lost his job because his mother complained to his boss about the long hours the twenty something man was working in his job in NYC. Yikes!!
Gail suggested the book to me and I think summed it up best. “It’s a great pep talk about doing what’s best for your kid even when it pushes you outside of your comfort zone or societal expectations. There will be parts that will feel uncomfortable and make you rethink the way you do things, but I think that’s healthy.”